Plus two bonus cartoons cuz a couple of them suck — I came up with the feature cartoon while stuck behind one semi truck trying to pass another on a hill. One was going 45 mph, the other 46 mph. This provided plenty of time for the mind to wander. If I were to make more than $2 from this collection…

Sometimes I just want to cuddle — She’s insatiable. I know it’s her one job, and it’s nice that she’s enthusiastic about it, but I just can’t keep up anymore. When I was younger, I didn’t mind when she woke me up at 3am for some rod and socket play. Like a good undertaker, she’d bury all…

The Terror of Standup — This is a bad idea. I’ve had bad ideas before, but this is far and away the worst. The fact that I’m doing it while my wife is out of town and that I didn’t tell any of my friends is proof of the badness of this bad decision. I’m…

Join me next week while I shovel snow and solve the climate crisis — There’s some backstory to this, so let’s start with my dogs. Does anybody have dogs? Dogs are great, right? I love my dogs. Here’s one of my dogs.

Save ski bums from devastating self-awareness. — The Affordable Drug Act within the Build Back Better plan will be a life changer for ski bums. The average ski bum spends $1200/month on edibles and smokables. …

Don’t encourage me or I’ll keep drawing them — I used to work in IT, but that doesn’t mean I won’t turn on my own kind. Have you seen those commercials where they spray Febreze all over everything? Am I the only one that wonders where all the Febreze and all the odors go?

What drove it to this extreme? — I started my car yesterday, and the dashboard lit up. Check engine, check tires, check traction control, all shades of yellow, orange, and red. My car believed everything was suddenly conspiring against it. I couldn’t drive it like this. What would people think? Plus, it would only make right turns. …

With a bare behind — A crashing sound awakened us one morning. It was springtime when bears come out of hibernation and begin looking for things to eat. Our neighbors had a habit of leaving their trash out, and it attracted bears. I went onto my deck and looked down at the driveway to see…